L is for Love Equals Listening (And Lilacs)

It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness.

We have no scar to show for happiness.

We learn so little from peace.

~ Chuck Palahniuk

Back in January, I began the One Page a Day Challenge and immediately threw away my quill.  Now in April, I’m participating in the A to Z Blogging Challenge and prepping for a Wilderness Writers’ Retreat.  I need ink, a stiff drink and therapy.

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oday I wanted desperately to be lazy.  This is what comes of a three day weekend.

Laziness and procrastination and a “I don’ wanna” attitude.

Are we there yet?  No?  Sigh.  How many more letters to go in this thing!?

I was going to just start writing about lazy days and summer.  But apparently Mother Nature may have the last laugh ~ again.  Might get snow ~ light, mind you, but still ~ tomorrow evening.  And that thought brought me right back to my original idea for this post: lilacs and the rewards of listening.

L is for Listening

We all notice the people who remember us:  the gift that is just what we wanted.  The dish that was made with our dietary restrictions, allergies, and intolerances in mind.  The words of encouragement that were said at the moment we needed to hear them.

It’s not terribly difficult to be that person.  I always listen when one of my friends says they like or want something, but I am super forgetful and so learned to write things down in my address book.  Favorite colour.  Favourite store.  Favorite food.  Love languages.  Personality types.

Shhh, don’t tell them I do that.  They think I’m magically gifted in remembering these things.  Google Contacts, how I love thee.

Lilacs, Easter 2011
Image credit: Mikaela D'Eigh

My father is not that type of person.  It’s just not his personality.  And that’s okay.  He provided a roof, a table, and food on it.  A grade-A education and the freedom to pursue it to the highest degree I wanted.

He is the stereotypical Eastern European: few words but many actions.

But one day, he listened.  And one day, he touched my heart like no one had before and only a couple of dear friends have been able to since. 

L is for Lilacs

About two months before the end of my sophomore year of college and a beautiful Spring day ~ the kind that doesn't come very often in Virginia: cool breezes and temperatures not yet in the humidifying eighties.  My parents and sibs were coming to visit and take some of my stuff back home that I didn't need.

On a phone call in the previous weeks, I had lamented that I would miss seeing the lilacs back home ~ they are notoriously short lived down here.  Imagine my surprise ~ and delight ~ when my father walked in carrying an armful of lilac blooms.

All so I wouldn’t miss seeing them that year.

L is for Love

It’s only been in recent years that my father has taken to saying “I love you.”  Something about reaching your late eighties and nineties is mellowing.  And it’s been healing ~ for both of us.

I love words.  They have power.  They have meaning.  They have life.  But I learned very early on that love doesn’t always use words.  Love speaks in actions too.  You just have to look for it.  And hold the memory close.

As for me, I’ll may eventually forget the particulars.  But I’ll never forget the time that Love listened, and brought me lilacs.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Darn allergies.  Acting up in the office again!  Ahem ~ so, what love language do you speak?  Do you know your loved ones’ love language?  Ask ~ you just might be surprised at their answers.

La Belle's Hobby Farm: Weathering the Storm

My green thumb came only as a result of the mistakes I made while learning to see things from the plant's point of view. 
~ H. Fred Dale

 

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ast Friday, a huge thunderstorm roared through here, knocking out our power for most of the night, and tearing all the blooms off the crabapple, apple, and cherry trees.  Fortunately, the lilacs held strong; as for the other, I was able to get pictures of all of them before the storm hit.

Apparently, sugar snaps love storms, because when I went out on Saturday to inspect the damage, they had shot up a few more inches since last week: 

As for my wee pots, the both types of broccoli and tomatoes are already sprouting. *Claps excitedly.*  They were actually outside when the storm hit, so they got a tad flooded; we ended up soaking up the excess water with paper towels because I learned my over-watering lesson last year.  Learn one lesson just in time to make another boo-boo.  When the storm hit, only the broccoli has sprouted. 

Temperatures dropped that night, so I brought them in.  A day and a half later, the tomatoes sprouted.  New lesson learned: getting your seeds to sprout requires a little more care and attention in terms of temperature regulation, a fact I didn’t pay quite as much attention to.

This prompted me to wish I had purchased grow lights.  Which then led to me wishing I had a small greenhouse.  I have a ton of old windows stacked up outside ~ might as well use them.  After all, recycling is part of the organic and sustainable lifestyle.  However, that is a project for later in the summer. 

For now, I’ll just enjoy watching my veggies grow up.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

La Belle's Hobby Farm: Affirming the Artist and the Gardener

‎ Every child is an artist.  The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up.  ~ Pablo Picasso

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here is nothing exciting going on at the hobby farm right now.  I still haven’t planted my “Start Indoors” seeds yet, although I do have the little organic pots, the organic starter compost and the seeds.  Just need to find the time! 

Silly nine-to-five, two-hour commute time-sucker job.

But then, that’s what makes this a “hobby” farm, oui?  So here are some pictures of what’s growing around the yard:



Paperwhites - darn!  Forgot to move the bulbs this winter!



Rosemary going strong!

Lilac buds; hoping my prune job this winter helped!



Daffodils are bustin' out all over!



In other news, my maternal roommate has been “encouraging” me to give it all up: my arts work, the farm idea.  And why is she doing this?

“Too stressful.”

“Too much money.”

“You need to think about saving for your retirement.”

“I just can’t picture you as a field hand sweating in the sun.”

Oh, I don’t know.  Call me crazy, but I think some things are worth doing, even if they cause us a little pain and discomfort; especially if they bring us more joy than pain.  And honestly, if some project isn’t causing me a little bit of pull and tug here and there, then I’m going to lose interest in it and go on to something else. 

But to hear this kind of “I’m just pointing out the flaws to help you” encouragement on a weekly basis can be wearing.  Thank heavens for supportive friends – they affirm my choices and truly encourage my pursuit of beauty and nature without being blind to the flaws in that pursuit.  I only wish they were geographically closer so I could hear more of them and less of the other.

My one consolation?  As soon as I get those seeds planted and the seedlings in the ground, I’ll be too busy weeding and harvesting to hear the negative talk.

To my fellow gardeners and artists: let’s encourage one another and resolve to block out negative “helpers.”

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Remember: constant negative criticism, like water, can wear away the heart.  Feedback isn’t the problem; negatively worded feedback is. 

Top Five Friday: Flowering Shrubs

God made rainy days so gardeners could get housework done.

~ Author Unknown

Unless of course, the gardener is also a writer.  Rainy days are for writing and reading ~ ahem, I mean research.

Today marks the beginning of a new feature here at La Belle: Top Five Fridays.  Every Friday, I will showcase top five lists in the following arts categories: Food, Gardening, Writing, Music and the Visual Arts.

This week’s top five comes from my love of flowering shrubs.  I love these five show stoppers mostly for their vibrant colours and/or their spicy scents.  Flowering shrubs are a Godsend to the gardener: they not only provide colour, but structure as well.  And they bloom every year and need minimal care. 

All links will lead you to Nature Hills Garden Catalog.  I chose to link to them because they are an organic seed and plant catalog, but I have not actually purchased any plants from them as all the flowering shrubs I have were passed down to me.

Top Five Flowering Shrubs

Lilac

Photo Credit: M. D'Eigh

Ever since I was a little girl, the lilac has been my favorite flower.  If someone brings me a bouquet of lilacs, I know they really know me!  Their very scent heralds the onset of Spring.  Best advice I’ve received about lilacs: wait until they finish blooming and then prune them.  Pruning helps them produce more blooms the following year.



Photo Credit: Adam Hickmott



Hydrangea

These luscious, voluptuous blooms are the divas of the garden.  We currently have three mountainous shrubs on the northeast side of the house and they range from lavender to a rich violet-tinged blue.  They make a grand tabletop statement bunched in a large bowl or in a short vase.  Just make sure you get them in water pronto.  I waited too long once and only 3 of the 6 blooms perked back up when I finally placed them in water.  [Don’t ask.]



Peony

After the bold hydrangeas, I love peonies for their bright pink colour and mesmerizing scent.  Maybe mine are just quirky, but their heavy little heads are forever bowing and scrapping to some unseen garden royalty.  I come out in the morning, and there they are, dragging the ground in shame, bit of dirt between their petals.  I’ve tried peony brackets, but they simply love to bend to the ground.  If any gardeners out there have any advice, I’d be most grateful!  Bowing and scrapping notwithstanding, peonies make a wonderful addition to the garden.  And you can divide them and share with a fellow gardener.

Photo Credit: M. D'Eigh

Rhododendron

“Rhodies” are the back up singers in this band of diva-ish shrubs ~ but they give you a lot bang for you buck.  Ours live between the Hydrangeas and are also currently in the front of the house, facing southeast.  The shrubs which fast true east fare a little better than the one that faces more south.  Not sure why this is.  But we plan on re-planting them somewhere else and putting in boxwood.  As you can see from this picture, the blossoms are strong in colour, but delicate in shape.  Sadly, one big thunderstorm with heavy sheets of rain washed away all the rhodie blooms. 



Photo credit: Simon Howden

 Lavender

Silly me.  I always thought lavender was an herb, not a shrub.  But these little ladies can get pretty big!  And they bloom year after year.  Bees and butterflies love it ~ and so do I. Especially stuffed in little lacy pillows or in a container of homemade bath salts.  The lavender flower also makes a nice “bow” on a boxed gift. 

What are your top five flowering shrubs and why?

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela