Blogger Overload: Does a Blogging Challenge Waste Your Readers' Time?

...a wealth of information creates a poverty of attention...

~ Herbert A. Simon

June is the FLX/WordCount Blogathon!  Join us for 30 Days of blogging madness!

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since I began this blog challenge, I’ve read two articles that said I shouldn’t be blogging every day.

Why didn’t you tell me that eleven days ago?!

Just kidding.  Sort of. 

I understand where both Jeff Goins and Copyblogger are coming from.  And they make excellent points about honing your skills as a writer and your reach as a blogger, points I agree with.

But for me right now, getting into the habit of writing every day is the sticking point. And sadly for my ADD brain, I won’t do remember to do it without an in-your-face motivator.

Like the public humiliation of saying I’m doing a challenge and then not posting every day.

The Good, the Bad, and the Downright Fugly

You’ve heard it before, I know.  Today, anyone and everyone can write, publish, reach out, gripe, complain, rant, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

We all like to talk.  Yes, even introverts ~ we talk long hand (i.e. writing).  But we don’t all edit.  Either our thoughts, our feelings, our words.  Or our blog posts.

And don't get me started on layouts.  Seriously, I’ve seen some real migraine-inducing webpages/blogs lately. Ugh!  Make it go away!

There’s an acronym that has been used to help people with anger-management or stress issues to deal with how they talk to people when in crisis mode.  You HALT and ask yourself, am I:

Hungry?
Angry?
Lonely?
Tired?

I’ll admit, this doesn’t always help me when I’m in a stressful situation.  I’m too busy thinking about the damn situation, not some acronym!

Image credit: Langstonwitches.org

But if there were one for writers, well, that might be more  helpful.  As a writer, I just sit and think a lot, write ideas down, and think some more.  Plenty of time to glance at a post it with HALT on it before hitting the publish button:

Is it Helpful to my readers?
Does it provide a new Angle?
Will it make my readers Laugh?
Will it bring my readers to Tears (and ultimately to a change)?

And I would add an S as well: Does it make any bloody Sense!?

Nothing loses a reader more than the deadly duo of poor grammar and poor sentence structure  married to a plot that leaves you cross-eyed.

But maybe that’s just me because I’m an ADD reader….

Respect the Reader

This ADD thing is really annoying actually for a writer who’s trying to post every day.  We have lives you know ~ it gives us something to write about.  But we don’t always plan.  Well, at least, I don’t.  

So it wasn’t until I sat down this afternoon and wrote out my goals for the reminder of the month that I realized that I would have to write, edit and publish or schedule five ~ read ‘em, 5 ~ posts before 12:30pm tomorrow.

I almost cried.

Not because I don’t love to write.  I do!

Not because I’m a perfectionist.  Although I am.

But because I love writing so much and I respect you as well that I cringe to have to churn out five readable, worthy posts in a few hours.  Because I know full well how important it is to edit.  And you have taken time out of your busy day to stop by and spend some time with me.

And I don’t want to waste those few minutes we spend together on a thrown-together post.

So Now What?

Thankfully, the weekends are slow.  So I have no problem posting pictures or  little tid bits or just a random “Hey, stop reading and go outside and play” type of post.

Also, it’s just for 30 days.  If you’ve followed me for very long, you’ll see that my problem is not information overload.   Mine is more depression-kicked-my-ass-again-I’m-feeling-lazy-today-I-don’t-post-for-months-on-end-itis.

So no worries.  I’m not going to drop off the face of the challenge just yet.  

But I will use the challenge to hone my writing skills so I can make sure you never leave without feeling encouraged, loved, enlightened, relaxed, and with a smile on your face.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Join Us: I’m now a member of Jeff Goins’ TribeWriters.  Join an incredible group of writers who are finding their voice and becoming better at their craft.  Today is the last day to sign up!!

Blogathon 2014: Writerly Madness!

"I wanted you to see what real courage is. . .

It's when you know you're licked before you begin,

but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what.”

~ Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

June is the FLX/WordCount Blogathon!  Join us for 30 Days of blogging madness!

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ow it begins.  And so of course, I wish I hadn’t signed up for it.  I’m contrary like that.

But a blogging challenge is good for me.  Sort of like oatmeal and carrots.

Blah. 

June is National PTSD Awareness Month, but there’s only so much I can write since I don’t personally have an experience of it or know many people who suffer from it.

So I’m going to continue to write about subjects pertaining to mental health in general and relationships in particular, because the two are so intertwined.

And since it’s also planting season here in Zone 7, I’ll be updating you on my garden ~ because that is also connected to my own personal mental health.

Join me for the next 30 days.  And if you’re new here, welcome to the funny farm!

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Apologies, this should have published on time, but there were tech issues.

Depression Is Not Spelled S-E-L-F-I-S-H: Compassionate Self-Care

Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries.

Without them, humanity cannot survive.

~ Dalai Lama XIV, The Art of Happiness

May is National Mental Health Awareness Month.  Join me in blogging to erase the stigma of mental illness so our loved ones can seek the help they need.

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his weekend mirrored my life: a little light, a little dark; a hill of joy, and a hole of sadness.The moments of light outnumbered the darkness.  But darkness weighs more. 

And when your Sunday ends with both your energy level and your mood on the craptastic end of things, Monday is a just a joy-filled experience.

Not.

The Necessity of Compassion

All I could feel as I sat at my desk this morning was loss, betrayal, anger, and helplessness.  It was compounded by the text I received from my therapist, who tried to be supportive, but ended up pushing my spiritual cliché b*itch button.  

I waited half a beat before texting him a snarly reply, and he agreed that his words weren't actually helpful. 

Two minutes later, I followed it with a “I’m-so-mind-f*cked-please-ignore-whatever-I-say” text.

To which he replied: 

“No worries – we understand and accept each other just as we are: fire and light; light and shadows.” 

Which immediately calmed me down.  The feelings didn’t go away, but the hold they had on me lessened.  I was not my feelings ~ they just were what they were, and soon, they would pass.

Pack Your Bags for a Guilt Trip!

Even still, I struggled with ideas for today’s post, beating myself up for not having something more encouraging to say.  Why couldn’t I just focus on the good feelings that

had made up the majority of the weekend?  I should be ra-ra-ing and being a beacon of light for mental health, blah, blah.

Well, yeah.  And guess what?  Part of shining a light on mental health is being truthful and transparent about my own struggles.  And having suffered with bouts of depression on and off for years, I know that self-care is a huge stumbling block for us.  Because many of us ~ probably even the majority of us ~ are care-givers in some capacity.  

The expectation that we need to be “on” twenty-four/seven is hammered into our psyches and woe betide anyone who is switches to the “off” position.  

If we feel exhausted in the middle of the day and lay down to take a nap,
we feel guilty.  

If we’re depressed or anxious and take a pill to cope, we feel guilty. 

If we make plans to meet friends, and then call off because socializing takes energy we don’t have, we feel guilty.

The sad thing?  Our loved ones ~ who should be supportive and accepting ~ usually help us pack for the guilt trip, berating and upbraiding us for our “failures” and our “weaknesses.” 

And because we are already depleted, our boundaries bombarded and our hearts bruised by mental illness, we listen to their lies and their barbed words and fall deeper into the rabbit hole of isolation and depression.

Planting Your Own Garden of Self-Care

But it’s okay to take a nap during the day.  Hey, the Europeans do it and no one calls them lazy!

It’s okay to take medication to help lift your spirits.  Not, I’m not a huge fan of Big Pharma, but I do believe there is a time and a place for certain medications.  And certain mental illness are chemical in nature, so meds are a necessity, not a superfluous luxury.

Image credit: Eleanor Brownn

It’s okay to back out of plans if you’re depressed.  I know this is not a popular sentiment, but the ones who usually get upset are friends and hostesses who don’t understand what it’s like to have such low amounts of energy that getting from the bed to the bathroom takes a Herculean effort.

And I am eminently qualified to make such a statement because I used to be the kind of hostess that would huff and puff if someone canceled on one of my big fancy dinners at the last minute. 

Now I’m all like ~ hey, no problem, more for me!  Just kidding, I’ll make a plate and bring it by if you like.

Learning As I Go

I don’t have all the answers, but that’s okay too.  I’m suffering and learning as I go.  What works for me, may not work for you.  But what is universal is that we need to give ourselves permission to relax.  

To sleep when we need to.  To eat healthy.  To have a bubble bath in the middle of the week.  To get a massage or a have a full spa day.

And to remember, we understand and accept each other here: light and fire and sun and shadow.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Why is that taking care of ourselves is seen as selfish?  How can we destroy this false belief?

W is for Writing Challenges: Ready for Another Round!

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not;

and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.

~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Back in January, I began the One Page a Day Challenge and immediately threw away my quill.  Now in April, I’m participating in the A to Z Blogging Challenge and prepping for a Wilderness Writers’ Retreat.  I need ink, a stiff drink and therapy.

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must be a masochist. 

Only three more days to go in the A to Z Challenge and I’m prepping for another blogging challenge in May.

What can I say?  As much as I witch and moan, these challenges are a great training program for writers.  If you didn’t have a daily writing habit before, you do now.  The key is continuing the practice after the challenge has ended.

W is for Writing Challenges

Every writer is different.  Every blog is different. 

Maybe blogging every day isn’t your bag. 

Maybe you are a disciplined writing machine and don’t need to do another challenge.

But as for me and my Muse, we will blog challenge as long as we can.  It hones our writing muscles and forces us to write every day.

So I tooled around the ‘net looking for another blogging challenge.  30-Day, 26-Day, Once-a-Week ~ I didn’t care.  I just wanted community support, and enough structure to push me.

And I couldn’t find any.  At least not with the subject I was looking for.

Writing for a Cause 

Image credit: Bill Watterson

May is National Mental Health Month.  And mental illness is something I am very passionate about, but it seems I haven’t been as vocal about it.  I bought into the social stigma that still surrounds it.  No one is ashamed when they’re diagnosed with cancer or a heart condition.

Even HIV has managed to overcome its social pariah status.

But somehow, being diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, or depression, or schizophrenia is shameful. 

Don’t get me wrong.  I know we are more open and accepting of helping people who suffer from mental and emotional illness today than at any other time in history since the dawn of Freud's couch.  

But so much more needs to be done.

Working Together

One way to help raise awareness is to do a blog challenge with mental health as the theme.  So for the month of May, I’m going to blog five days a week ~ that’s 22 days ~ about Mental Health.

Now, I don’t mind doing this by myself.  But the more people who do this, the more awareness we can raise.  And the more support we have as writers. 

If you’d like to join me, please email me mdeigh (at) gmail (dot) com with your blog name/address and your email address.

Let’s hone our writing skills and shine a light in the darkness of mental illness at the same time.  You never know whose life you may touch.

Or save.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Are you doing another blog challenge after this one?

R is for Restless: We Gotta Get Outta This Place!

You live like this, sheltered, in a delicate world, and you believe you are living. Then you read a book… or you take a trip… and you discover that you are not living, that you are hibernating. The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom (when hibernating becomes dangerous and might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure. That is all. It appears like an innocuous illness. Monotony, boredom, death.

~ Anaïs Nin

Back in January, I began the One Page a Day Challenge and immediately threw away my quill.  Now in April, I’m participating in the A to Z Blogging Challenge and prepping for a Wilderness Writers’ Retreat.  I need ink, a stiff drink and therapy.

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aybe it’s because Winter was so long this year.

But you like Winter.

I know.  But each season has it’s time, and Winter missed its cue to walk off, stage left.  Spring has been waiting to make her debut.

You were feeling restless even when the snow was deep, and Spring was just a dream. 

Well, maybe it’s just since I’ve moved back home.   You know, they say you can never truly go home again.  And God only knows, my soul has been ripped to shreds at one point or another in the last three years.

You were restless and hurting four years ago.  Before you moved.

R is for Restless

A few years ago, I remember seeing a commercial for restless leg syndrome.  I ave restless brain syndrome.  And restless soul syndrome.  And restless writer’s syndrome.

I’m just…restless. 

But I don’t know what for. 

It’s just a general ennui, an itchy feeling in my heart that translates to my skin ~ until I no longer like it fits me anymore.  I need a new one.

Image credit:  Thanapol Praserdvigai

It’s a longing to be surrounded by breathtaking mountain views, far from the maddening crowds.  To lie in a field of violets and alfalfa.  To burrow in a hammock and watch the humming birds dance.  To just be and not to do.

And for that to be enough.

Because here in the everyday, it is never enough.  Never finished.  Never perfect.  Always something that needs fixing, picking up, moving around.  

I’m tired of living life as an active verb.  I want to live it as a passive verb for awhile.

Running Out of Excuses

And yet, like most people, I put off my R & R.  Time, that precious treasure, is hoarded up for future spending.  And for me, there’s a good reason ~ I’m not my own person.  I work for the Man.  And so I need to save up my vacation time for Kodiak.

(Angels break into song.)

But that doesn’t mean I can’t take an hour here or a day off there.  I work a compressed schedule, so I really have no good reason not to relax.  And every reason to jump off the Tilt-a-Wheel.

It’s exhausting being responsible.  But it’s equally exhausting being restless.  There is nowhere for the energy to go.  It just sits there, humming inside of you, begging for an outlet, any outlet. 

And it’s better if you plan the release. 

Because here, there is no Autobahn.

Because here, there be dragons. 

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

Are you restless? Why or why not?

Letters Challenge: To Myself When I Was Young and Vulnerable

Letters are among the most significant memorial a person can leave behind them. 
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Beginning in January, I am participating in the One Page a Day Challenge.  Hopefully by the end of the year, I'll have 365 pages worth editing.

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now. I remember wishing, hoping, thinking, praying, and dreaming of snow.  Not just any old snow.  Snow the amount and depth that gave Laura Ingalls Wilder cabin fever!  Sure it was fun to play in it and build snowmen.  But mostly I prayed for snow so I didn’t have to go to school.

Now I pray for enough snow to cause my office to shut down.

Either that, or no snow at all.  Like the true Virginian I am, I am terrified of driving in icy conditions.  And that’s usually what happens here in the Old Dominion.  Ice underneath snow causes vehicles to spin and flip over.

Snow also causes one to slow down, enjoy a pot of tea, and reflect.

And reflection, I have done.  My pen has been scritch-scratching away ~ in my journal, in letters to friends, and in my Ten Letters in Ten Days challenge.  As promised, here is the first one ~ the letter to my past self.

To Me When I Was Young, Naïve, and  unwisely Vulnerable

Dear Me,

Sorry to scare you with that whooshing sound.  That’s just the sound the Tardis makes when she’s coming in for a landing (appearing?) 

You may very well think I’m crazy, but it’s me.  Or rather, you – only older.  And hopefully wiser, although the jury is still out on that.

Image credit: Google Images

My first thought in writing to you, er, me, was to warn you about some things that will happen: heartaches, betrayals, the emotional and mental health issues of loved ones.  The misuse of hard-earned trust.

But I find that I actually like who I’ve become. 

Oh, I have some regrets of course ~ everyone does.  But I want to tell you, the crosses and scars you bear now will only make you stronger.  Always remember that true strength lies in wise vulnerability.

What do I mean by that? 

Well, only silly people are vulnerable to everyone Tom, Dick, and Harry that they meet.  You’re intuitive (something that I wish I’d known years ago), with a big heart that is easily sucked in.  You love people, and you love to comfort and care for them.  This is all well and good.  But care wisely and cautiously.  Not everyone wants your good.  And some?

Well, some will break your heart simply because they can.

Oh, and at least two schmucks you meet harbor a pathological hatred of women.  I won’t tell you who ~ even though I’d like to put them in a sack and beat them senseless, their hurtful words and betrayals served a purpose as well. 

You will need to be stripped bare of all attachments for a time.  It will hurt like the furthest reaches of hell, but you’ll survive.  What is more important, you will need to learn to thrive.  It is a lesson I am still learning, and probably will struggle with the rest of my days.

So here is my advice ~ not that you’ll take it, you always had a stubborn, independent streak.  That’s a good thing ~ just remember to listen to those who are truly wise.  You will know them by their unconditional love and acceptance of you, and their joy in your presence.  They simply radiate goodness.  You’ll meet one soon and let me tell you, you are gonna love Miss Moopes.  She will be a balm and a guide in one of your darkest hours.

These are the most important things to hold on to:

Loyalty

Unconditional love

Compassion

The ability to listen without judgment

Empathy

Learn the Five Love Languages and discover which ones your friends and family “speak”

Journal often ~ every day if you can.

Therapy is healthy; just remember some shrinks are crazy and don’t always have the answer.

Let go

Forgive often and without bitterness

Learn to be comfortable with conflict and confrontation

You aren’t the center of the world – so don’t take things personally (see letting go)

Put yourself in the other person’s shoes (see empathy)

Dream big ~ you’ve got what it takes

Keep telling stories

Most importantly, tend your own fire and plant your own garden ~ no one else can do it for you, and although some might help now and then, your gifts and talents are your responsibility.  Only you can make them grow.

And my dear, you have many gifts and a good heart.  Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently or try to take that away.

My one regret is that I listened too often to those who were jealous, empty, or insecure.  You are loved.  Just not by everyone. 

And that’s okay.

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

If you wrote a letter to yourself, how old would you be?  And what advice would you give yourself?