Word Count Blogathon Day 25: The Art of the Thank You Note

If a fellow isn't thankful for what he's got, he isn't likely to be thankful for what he's going to get. 

~ Frank A. Clark

Do you know where ill-mannered people come from?  They come from one of two places:

1) Ill-mannered parents ~ they taught their children to be rude by displaying their own lack of manners.

2) Indifferent or Frazzled parents ~ these parents either did not care or were “too busy” to teach their children any manners.

There are the rare exceptions, who despite being raised properly, choose to become rude as a form of rebellion.  But my point is this:  good manners start at home.  And unless you want to help fill the world with nasty boorish bums, it would behoove you to: 

1) Learn manners yourself

2) Teach them to your children

Traditionally, a child who learns the good habit of saying “Please” and “Thank you” is not likely to forget it.  It is after all, a habit ~ something that becomes second nature to us and that we are able to do almost without thinking.  Opening doors or not allowing them to slam in the face of the person walking in behind you is another good habit that a child will remember long after you are not around to check on him.

Thank You Notes

One of the manners I was taught as a child that is still very much with me is the lovely duty of writing thank you notes.  My own mother taught me to write a thank you note right away and to let no more than a week go by before sending them out. 

Here’s what Emily Post has to say about it:

Handwritten notes are warmer and more special than other forms of thank-yous. The rule of thumb is that you should send a written note any time you receive a gift (even a ‘thank you’ gift) and the giver wasn’t there to thank in person.

She goes on to say that today you can get by with an email if the gift giver is a close friend, but in my opinion, if your best friend gave you a gift or welcomed you into her home, even more so should you send her a handwritten note!

Stationery for Children

This is also a good habit that children should definitely be encouraged to learn.  And to make learning it more fun, stationery stores have a huge selection of children’s stationery.  Here are a few of my favorites:

Tiny Prints is an online stationery store with hundreds of designs, both for adults and for kids.  These are a couple of my favorites for kids:



Pirate Ship from Tiny Prints



Notice that they have stationery for both girls and boys?  Boys need to be taught the art of saying thank you; it is an art that will serve him well throughout his life.

The Stationery Studio is another online stationery store.

Sweet Cupcakes from Tiny Prints

The Dandelion Patch is online and is also located in Leesburg, Virginia.  It is a great store with a wonderful atmosphere.  And the Leesburg Outlets are nearby too!

The Papery has several locations.  They have a fair selection of Crane Stationery [one of my favorites!] and an amazing collection of invitations that you can personalize.

Roaring Lion from Tiny Prints

Some say that such manners are out-dated.   But I don’t think any acts of love and kindness, no matter how small, are ever out of style. 

Do you?

Oremus pro invicem,

~ Mikaela

The Art of Letters

Because sending a letter is the next best thing to showing up personally at someone's door.
~ Brett McKay

Recently I joined The Letter Exchange. It has been a wonderful experience thus far ~ I have several new correspondents. This evening I was answering a couple of their letters and I casually browsed the 'net for more on my favorite subject. I came across two delightful websites, each with an old post about the lost art of letter writing. My dears ~ do visit The Art of Manliness and Red Ravine ~ both are absolutely inviting!

All I can say is that Kate McKay is one blessed lady! They do not make gentlemen like Brett McKay anymore. Well, actually, they do...for there he is! Are there any more like him out there? Good heavens, gents, stand up and be counted ~ and drop me a line! ;)

Now off to finish my correspondence.

Oremus pro invicem,
~ Mikaela

Responding to Ill-Mannered Boors

The everyday kindnesses of the back roads
more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines.
~ Charles Kuralt

Today, on the commute in to work, I saw witnessed two gentlemen [out of thirty men, sigh] offer their seats on the train to ladies standing in the aisle. I wanted to thank them even though I was not one of the ladies needing a seat. It was a great way to start the day with exampled of manly courtesy ~ because the day ended less than stellar. A man who I thought was a friend ~ albeit a casual one ~ said something to me that went so beyond the bounds of decency that I could only ignore him in shocked silence.

Perhaps, dear reader, you are tired of reading my complaints about our insufferable and ill-mannered society. At the same time, something must be done about this epidemic of ill-mannered boorishness!

Now, some of you will ask me why I did not slap my so-called friend. Saying nothing was actually a step up for me. Sad to say, I am not perfect in this regard ~ actually I am not perfect in most regards! At times, when confronted with rude remarks spoken either in front of me or to me, I have responded in an equally most ill-bred manner. There is of course, a time and a place to fight fire with fire. But when one returns a rude remark to a boor with another rude remark, it is safe to say that he will only continue to respond in kind. Furthermore, he will usually take vicious delight in escalating the situation, until one’s esteem lies in shreds around one’s pretty little ankles and later, in the privacy of one’s boudoir, to tears. [This is so much worse for us INFPs/ENFPs.]

However, dear reader, you are correct ~ one cannot just let such rudeness continue unchecked and unaddressed. So what is a civilized person to do? I am beginning to believe that the obvious must be stated. “Please do not say such uncouth and disrespectful things to me. I find it degrading and hurtful. Thank you.” I need to practice saying this in the privacy of home, because I would much rather grit my teeth and call into question his upbringing. I can hear my Southern mother saying: “His mama didn’t raise him right!” And it is certainly possible she did not, or it could be that the son refused to listen.

Whether this ladylike retort will have any effect on this particular boor, I know not. But I am convinced that refusing to stoop to a boor’s level keeps up at least a modicum of decency and civility. As they say: “Fake it until you make it!” Continued civility can only eventually beget civility.

What do you think? How have you handled rude remarks made about you, or in front of you about other people?

Hope you have a beautiful [and genteel] rest of the week!

Oremus pro invicem,
~ Mikaela

In a Manner of Speaking

Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter which fork you use.
~ Emily Post

Cutting down on as much carbon emissions and gasoline usage as possible by taking public transportation as often as you can is something I advocate but had not until recently been able to do. Happily, a recent job change enabled me to leave my car at home and take the metro every day. I discovered that in addition to saving me time, gas and money, the switch also: 1) provides me with some much needed “think” time in the morning and evening; 2) greatly reduced my road rage; 3) potentially saves lives and limbs as I no longer wonder what happened in between leaving work and getting home, so engrossed in my thoughts I usually am; and 4) enables me to people watch. And let me tell you, colour matters! ;-)

Don't believe me? Take a ride on the Orange Line during rush hour ~ either in the morning or in the evening. Then take a ride on the Blue Line the next day at the same times. I have been doing this for five weeks straight now and I have noticed a marked difference between the manners of Orange Line riders and Blue Line riders. If you are so unfortunate as to be stuck on the Orange Line, make sure you get up and wiggle your way to the door AT LEAST two to three stops before you need to get off. Noone moves out of the way for passengers getting off at a stop on the Orange Line. And if you dare to clear your throat, or murmur a polite “Excuse me”, you get everything from out right glares to blank looks. But no movement.

My road rage may be gone but not my exasperation with stupidity and down right rudeness.

Riders on the Blue Line, however, are much more accommodating; some will even step off the train to let others off, before getting back on themselves. And I have observed this when riding in either direction ~ into the city or out of it. Now, grant you, the Orange Line does have more passengers on it, generally speaking. But that does not explain the attitudes of the people. Blue Line riders are just as tired after a long day, but they still smile and move out of the way. Even when they are packed in tightly during rush hour.

And as long as we are keeping score on rider manners, Blue Line riders are three times more likely to give up their seats for someone older or disabled. I have witnessed this myself. I have yet to see it happen on the Orange Line. But I will allow that I am not on the Orange Line all the time. In fact, I tend to wait an extra four minutes just to ride the more mannerly Blue Line.

So to all your Orange Line riders out there: take a moment and kindly let your fellow passengers through to their stop.

Oremus pro invicem,
~ Mikaela