My task, which I am trying to achieve is, by the power of the
written word, to make you hear, to make you feel--it is, before all, to make
you see.
~ Joseph Conrad, Lord
Jim
In October, I am writing about all things autumnal: from art
to spooky books, author interviews, recipes, and autumn-inspired writing
prompts AND participating in the Two Pages-a-Day writing challenge.
|
D
|
ump me right into the
action and I will get caught up in whatever world you have
created, no matter how bizarre or preposterous.
Narrate too much, and
you will lose me, no matter how creative the plot may be.
K.N. Lee’s Netherworld: the Chronicles of Koa opens with a bloody
sword fight in her living room. Is it
weird that Koa can stand on the ceiling?
Of course. But you picked up a
urban fantasy/paranormal book, not Emma. The strange and inexplicable had better be
part of the story!
Koa is attacked by
Syths but thank Flannery, Lee doesn’t spend time narrating the history of
Syths, how they were spawned, who they serve, etc. Koa fights them, kills them, and the scene
shifts to a Paris coffee shop. You immediately
want to know more. And Lee obliges, but
she lets the story tell itself.
As it should be.
Show Me
Yours
Anton Chekhov once
said “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken
glass.” This sage advice should be the
watch word for all writers, but especially writers of paranormal and fantasy stories.
Showing, not telling,
with the written word is tricky, but doable.
And the key is action words.
Bad:
With her energy surging, an energy that came from her unique blood and genetic make-up, she flew up the wall, intending to grab her assailant.
Good:
With a surge of energy, she took flight. She grunted as she lifted the large man’s weight off the ground.
Using “ing” to
describe an action creates a slow cadence in the story. And that is the last thing you want in an
action scene. A good paranormal or
fantasy story is multi-layered ~ it isn’t all blood and battle scenes. But those battles scenes should be filled with
short, choppy action verbs; they echo the fall of blades and limbs.
 |
|
Image Credit: K.N. Lee
|
Cut Out Every
Other Word
Another great piece of
advice for paranormal writers ~ and any writer ~ comes from Mark Twain. “As to the adjective, when in doubt, strike
it out.”
I would echo that and
add my own: be wary of adverbs. They can
get really old very quickly.
See what I did just did there? Good.
This would be my only
critique of Koa. I was confused at times as to what was
narration and what was the heroine’s inner monologue.
Koa almost wished she could show her fangs to the waitress, and wipe that smile off her cute little face, but she resisted….Leave it to Koa to contemplate outing the entire vampire race to the poor, blissfully ignorant, humans.
Aha! So now we know exactly how Koa is different:
she’s a vampire. This line is perfect in
that it isn’t spelled out for the reader right away, but we assume fangs equals
vampire.
However, she wants to
show her fangs because the waitress is flirting with Halston, her very hot best
friend/boss. But she’s not jealous, and
not really irritated, so I don’t know why she’s getting fangy, unless it’s to
clue us in to what she is. Let’s step
back a paragraph and set the scene with a little more action.
Koa rolled her eyes as Halston gave his order in French and told the waitress she reminded him of Audrey Tatou. When he smiled and the cute waitress blushed, Koa contemplated showing her fangs just to get a reaction.
Blissful, ignorant humans.
In this version, the facts don’t
need to be spelled out. If the humans are
ignorant, then we know three things: 1) vampires live among us but are hidden, 2) they look normal,
and 3) they can be out during the day.
Words are powerful,
but they have to be used in the right way and in the right order, much like a
spell. Because that is what a great
writer is ~ a mage who snaps incredible worlds and people into existence with
just the right words.
Even if that world is
ours, with strange characters hiding in plain sight.
Bravo, Ms. Lee. I will never see Paris quite the same after
Koa’s adventures. I look forward reading book #2!
Oremus pro invicem,
~ Mikaela
No comments:
Post a Comment